One of the biggest challenges on your path to elegance is breaking old habits and forming new, refined ones. If you’re like I was when I began this journey, you may have picked up some habits that aren’t very classy. It can be tough to recognize and admit these less-than-ideal habits.
Our lives are shaped by our habits. If you have a regular job and a daily routine, you’re living on autopilot. If your habits are positive, that’s great. But if you’re looking to make positive changes, it’s time to evaluate and adjust your habits.
In this post, we’ll explore your habits in detail. I’ll explain the Habit Loop, a concept I learned about last year that helped me a lot in breaking bad habits, and I’ll share tips on how to build new, better habits.
STEP 1. IDENTIFY YOUR NOT-SO ELEGANT HABITS
When was the last time you really thought about your habits? Do you ever find yourself thinking, “I need to quit this bad habit”?
If you haven’t given much thought to your habits before, this might take a little time. At first, you might only notice some habits you want to change. But once you start paying attention, you’ll begin to spot more of them. I used to note them down on my phone and review them later.
Start by focusing on one bad habit. Here are a few common ones—do any of these sound familiar?
- Spending too much time on your phone
- Eating poorly
- Procrastinating
- Not getting enough sleep
- Being disorganized
Once you’ve picked one habit to work on, you can move on to the next step.
STEP 2: USE THE HABIT LOOP
The habit loop consists of 3 key parts
The Cue: This is what triggers the habit. It can be a specific time of day, a location, or an emotional state.
The Routine: This is the behavior or action you automatically take when the cue happens.
The Reward: This is the benefit you get from the routine, such as a feeling of pleasure, stress relief, or a dopamine boost.
Here’s how you can work to stop the habit of scrolling too much in the morning:
The Cue: You wake up and check your phone to see the time because you don’t have a clock in your room.
The Routine: You look at the time, then start checking social media and emails. This leads to scrolling and wasting time on your phone, often for an hour or more.
The Reward: Scrolling through social media gives you a quick boost of dopamine.
To break this habit, you can:
- Get a clock for your room so you don’t need your phone to check the time.
- Keep your phone outside the room while you sleep to avoid reaching for it immediately when you wake up.
- Place your journal and yoga mat by your bed so you’re more likely to write or stretch before picking up your phone.
STEP 3: BREAK YOUR BAD HABITS ONE BY ONE
Now that you’ve seen how to identify, analyze, and create a plan to break a bad habit, it’s time to start working on changing your habits one by one.
It’s best not to try to break multiple habits at once. Since you’ve had these habits for a long time, you need to give yourself enough time to change them for good.
Using a journal or a document on your computer can be really helpful. Write down your habits and use the habit loop to analyze them.
STEP 4: CREATE ELEGANT HABITS
You’ve reached the exciting part! Becoming a more elegant version of yourself means building a new lifestyle, step by step. Your habits play a big role in this transformation.
You can choose any habits that will help you get closer to the life you want to live.
For example, if you want a more elegant body, you might start with better eating and exercise habits. If you want to boost your self-esteem, you could develop self-care and self-love routines throughout your day.
To create a new habit, write down the habit you want to build, then outline a habit loop for it. You get to decide what the cue and reward will be.
STEP 5: CREATE NEW REWARDS
To successfully build new habits, you need to create new rewards. You usually stick to a habit because there’s a reward at the end.
Get creative with your rewards. For example, if you’re working on a fitness goal, you might treat yourself to a new outfit every few weeks to celebrate your progress.
Rewards can be big or small.
I use a habit app to keep track of my rewards. When I complete a habit for a certain number of days in a row, I reward myself with something special, like a manicure or an item I’ve been wanting.
BONUS TIP! HABIT STACKING
Habit stacking means adding a new habit to something you already do regularly.
For example, if you want to become more knowledgeable and you already spend a lot of time on social media, you can use habit stacking.
Follow a few pages about topics you want to learn, like science, psychology, or fashion. This way, while you’re on social media, you’ll see content that helps you learn and grow.
CONCLUSION
It will take effort, and sometimes a new habit you’re trying to build might not work out as planned. If that happens, you might need to adjust it to fit your lifestyle better.
No matter what challenges come up, keep working on changing your habits. They didn’t form overnight, so it will take time to break them and replace them with new ones. You’ve got this!